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Carol Perkins: Demons. They are circling

A column with a warning for impatient, discourteous honkers: The next time you honk for someone to move on, there might be a demon possessed senior citizen in front of you!
Next earlier Carol Perkins column: Carol Perkins: 'What was I thinking?'

By Carol Perkins

Demons. They are circling, and even though I can dodge them occasionally, one smacked me on the head last week at the red light at Hatcher and Saddler Funeral Home between North Race and Happy Valley Road. I didn't see it coming, but I felt it when it took control. Here is what happened.

Susan Chambers and I had finished our radio show (99.1 the Hoss) and decided to meet for lunch. We both had errands to run, so we didn't ride together. I was a little late, and the green light turned red right at the intersection, catching me. However, that meant I would be the first when it turned green again.

I was not distracted. My cell phone was in my purse and my eyes were looking ahead, so what followed was not justified in the least. Just as the light turned green and before I could get my foot off the brake and on the gas peddle, the driver behind me "laid" on his horn. Startled, I looked around to see if I were the one being told to "move it!" What had I done wrong? After getting over the need to move out of his way as if I had been scolded, I felt the demon. "How dare some idiot honk his horn before I had time to accelerate?" In a flash, anger gripped me and held on.

For a split second, I almost opened the car door, stood on the running board, and yelled, "YOU GOT A PROBLEM?" However, the demon didn't have THAT much control. I was a coward, so I eased my car down Happy Valley as slowly as I could before turning into the restaurant, making this driver ride my bumper. "I'll fix you." The demon was back.

I jumped out quickly, so I could get a look at the culprit. Thinking it was probably some middle-aged man, I was totally wrong. The horn-honker was a young woman probably needing to get to pilates or to the gym. What was the hurry? If there is that much of a rush, a driver needs a light on top of his car and a siren.

Honking a horn sends two messages: "Hey, glad to see you." or "Move it." This isn't the first time I have had a "honker" behind me, but this was the first time I wanted to get out of my car. > What did I think I would do? With one arthritic hip and one knee requiring injections, the running board was as far as I was going. The next time you honk for someone to move on, there might be a demon possessed senior citizen in front of you!

(My new book, A Girl Named Connie, is available at Blossoms Florist and Boutique Unique, 507 Happy Valley Road, Glasgow, KY 42141, Phone 270-629-3597; the Edmonton/Metcalfe Chamber of Commerce, 109 E Stockton Street, Edmonton, KY, Phone 270-432-3222; and the Lighthouse Restaurant, 1500 Sulphur Well/Knob Lick Road, Sulphur Well Historic District, KY 42129. Phone 270-629-3597. And Also on

I would love to hear from you at or call 270-670-4913.

This story was posted on 2017-04-26 11:25:25
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