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Carol Perkins: Send me off

Columnist hit by wanderlust researches places to be sent off to: Michigan, Vermont, Ossabaw Island, and finally settles on another, more sophisticated place.
Next earlier Carol Perkins: Carol Perkins: Thoughts at Graduation Time.

By Carol Perkins

Guy and I were relaxing Sunday afternoon in front of the Weather Channel with the sound on mute when I turned to him and said, "I wish you would send me off." He caught my drift. "You needed to have been sent off years ago."

"No, I mean really send me off. Send me somewhere for a week or two."

"Do you want to be institutionalized? That probably can be arranged?"

"I was thinking of something more like a retreat with a spa and a swimming pool and horseback riding

I began to do some research.

Renew, Relax, and Rediscover
The first one I found was in Michigan. "Renew, Relax, and Rediscover" was their motto. I could choose from a variety of "physical, mental, and spiritual activities, enjoy a complimentary massage or reiki session, or just relax and take in nature."

According to the site, reiki is a Japanese technique for stress reduction and relaxation that also promotes healing. It is administered by "laying on hands" and is based on the idea that an unseen "life force energy" flows through us and is what causes us to be alive. Hmmm, not sure about this.

Then I read on. "Each spacious room sleeps 3-4 women - most rooms have private bathrooms." I quit going to camp 55 years ago.

Vermont lead: Too Kumbaya for me

There was one in Vermont that was tempting until I read the detailed description. "But nobody really understands you, and, truth be told, you don't really understand them either. Even though there are good people around you, when things get tough you feel pretty alone." I like alone and don't want to be understood. Frankly, this was too Kumbaya for me.

"Guy, I have decided where you can send me."

If he "sends" me that means he can pay for it, too!

Unspoiled Ossabaw Island

Then I read him the details of what I found. "The unspoiled beauty of Ossabaw Island has attracted writers, artists, and musicians to live on the island for short periods of reflection, research, and creativity in the mid-to-late 20th century. Come join us for six days and five nights of writing, workshops and one-on-one manuscript consultations with nationally recognized authors. Space is highly limited, so please sign up early."

Then I changed my mind. I was afraid if I went to a writing workshop I would discover that I can't write. Better leave well enough alone.

I want to be sent off - but NYC might be more suitable for me.

I still want to be sent off, but I think New York City might be more suitable for me.

I could go to plays, shop, and walk through Times Square. I could take the open air bus tour, ride the subway to Chinatown, eat in Little Italy, and take a harbor boat ride. Sounds like a good place to Renew, Relax, and Rediscover.

Anyone want to go? - Carol Perkins

This story was posted on 2015-06-06 06:04:31
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