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Carol Perkins: Grannies just wanta have fun

Remember how Carol Perkins had urge to just slap somebody? Opportunity presented itself at grannies night out at Yum Center. But she didn't seize that opportunity.
Next earlier column: Thoughts on graduation, Posted May 29, 2014

By Carol Perkins

"Girls just wanta have fun." Cyndi Lauper launched into her classic for the massive crowd gathered in the Yum Center for Cher's Dress to Kill Tour 2014 Monday night. Cyndi was her opening act. Legendary rocker and role model for women who dared to enter a man's world of Rock's Roll; she is one of few who has won an Emmy, a Grammy, and a Tony. Never did I think I would be part of a Cyndi Lauper audience.

Her bright red wig swayed to the head banging beat, and I was amazed that she could roll all over the stage and get up on her own at age 61. Unlike my friends and I who are not much older, she didn't need to crawl to the closest chair to pull herself up, or signal to the nearest guitar player to give her a hand. This lady was in shape.

Cher brings down the house

Speaking of shape, Cher proudly announced that she was 68 years old and brought down the house when she said, "And where is your grannie tonight?" My good friend Judy turned to me and said, "Here watching you!" I had never had the Cher experience. The dozens of costume changes, I expected. The set decor I expected. The powerful voice I expected. What I didn't expect was her presentation. Nothing short of regal. I loved her wit, her humor and she sweetness she showed when she sang "with Sonny" to "I've Got You, Babe." We lived through their ups and downs and mourned their divorce. It was comparable to the split of Martin and Lewis.

Going to concerts is a hobby

For my friends and me going to concerts is a hobby. We have done this since the sixties and fulfilling our bucket list (an overused term by now) is a goal. Golfers like to try out new courses; we like to listen to the musical greats. However, often the story is not in seeing the concert but in our getting there.

Connie Wilson, who lives in Louisville, was miserable in her pillow cast from the shoulder surgery she had had last week. Her elbow protruded, so meandering through rushing crowds was awkward. "Oh, I'm sorry," well meaning Cher fans said as they pushed and shoved to get up the escalator.

Judy Wallace Irvin, another of my lifelong friends, is having back surgery next week and walking is painful for her. Instead of stepping into my car, she had to get in knee first. Not much better than these two, I have a catch on the left side that takes me a minute to overcome before I can walk. Limp, Gimp, and Wimp.

Connie nearly knocked herself out

Connie, whose seat was with some of her Louisville friends, met us after the concert. "I nearly knocked myself out," she said rubbing the growing knot on her forehead.

"I was trying to get up the steps to my seat but this women in a long skirt kept stepping on her skirt and stopping in front of me and finally when she stopped too quickly, I tripped on her skirt and hit my head on the rail. I couldn't catch myself so I banged my head on it." She was really ticked at the woman for having on that long hippie style skirt!

Add concussion to list of maladies

"Do you have concussion?" Judy asked.

"Well, why not? Just add that to my list."

Connie cannot drive for six weeks so banging her head on the railing just gave her another reason to be mad!

Doesn't yield to yearning to slap somebody

Perhaps one of the funniest moments (not at the time) was when an usher led Judy and me to our seats. We were oohing and aahing over our good fortune when a feisty lady in front of us turned around and asked us if we were part of the Bachman group? She knew the answer. "You are in the wrong seats." She KNEW who was supposed to be in these seats and it wasn't us. Remember when I wanted to slap somebody? Well, I found her but, of course, I didn't. Our "real" seats weren't nearly as good.

Detour sends her toward Queen City

After the show, we headed down to the ninth street exit (which is how I have always gotten to 65 from the arena) but there was a detour so I accidentally headed toward Cincinnati. I turned off to make a circle but instead found myself stuck on a one way street going toward Broadway. From there I turned on First St. to take that ramp, but I forgot how tricky that is and turned one street too soon. Had to circle before getting on the right ramp. Connie lives off Watterson West, so as I started to take the correct exit, she told me to take the next one, "Don't go toward the fairgrounds." I listened and ended up going EAST on 264, making a circle on Poplar Level and back on 264 going west. Finally, we reached her home, pushed her out the door (not really) and headed home. I went to bed at 2 AM.

We may be slowing down, but these grannies "just wanta have fun." - Carol Perkins

This story was posted on 2014-06-08 08:24:24
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