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It's Just Me Again No. 085: Finally A Big Boy It's Just Me Again No. 085 Finally a Big Boy; remembering the end of bed-wetting The next earlier Chuck Hinman story: Divorce - Is It the Only Solution?Is Chuck Hinman your favorite Sunday with CM columnist, as many tell us? If so, we hope you'll drop him a line by email. Reader comments to CM are appreciated, as are emails directly to Mr. Hinman at: charles.hinman@sbcglobal.net By Chuck Hinman Living at a lovely place like Tallgrass Estates in Bartlesville, Oklahoma, you spend a disproportionate part of your life at the table, either eating sumptuously or waiting to be served. As you might guess, you frequently run out of intelligent things to talk about and the conversation digresses to something like this: "John, how old were you when you quit wetting the bed?"John and I are both octogenarians, he being more "octo" than I. I have learned after eating with John three meals a day, seven days a week for almost four years, that he definitely has selective hearing. In response to my question about bed-wetting, that sly fox didn't use his typical first response which is ... "Whaaaaaaaaat?" So, I decided to pursue another line of conversation. Upon returning to my apartment, I began to reminisce about my wed-betting days, I mean bed-wetting days. I was one of those wed-betters who would have an occasional accident after I was old enough to know better. How embarrassing! My brother Bob who was two years older than I always tattled on me at the breakfast table. "Mom, Chuck peed in bed last night and it got on me!" I would try to shush him but the harder I tried to quiet him, the louder he talked. Mom would say, "Oh Chuck, what are we going to do with you; you are too old to still be betting the wed!" I was speechless and often cried. Bob responded, "Make him wear a diaper like a baby!" "Shut your mouth or I'll do it in your mouth when you are snoring and keeping me awake," I hope I responded! Sibling rivalry obviously flourished in the Hinman household in those days! Things went along without any accidents until the summer of 1929. I was seven years old and finally becoming a "big boy." We had this wonderful large house with a huge porch that surrounded the house on the south and east sides and the whole family slept in beds on the porch all summer. It was wonderful especially on moonlit nights when lightening bugs filled the air. Sport, our farm dog joined us. When it came bed time, we were each responsible for getting the bedding for our bed (which had been folded up and placed in a closet in the house) and making our bed on the porch.Then one night, I had another accident and wet the bed, again! I was stunned and dreaded morning when Bob would announce to the world, that "HE DID IT AGAIN MOM!" Imagine my surprise when Bob didn't say a word. I could only conclude that I didn't have a gully washer and perhaps his territory was never drenched as mine was! But then I began to worry that Mom would find out when she went to fold up the bedding and put it in the closet for the day. I pondered how I could keep her from knowing. Then I proudly announced to MOM that I would help her and fold up Bob's and my bedding. She said, "That's a nice boy, Chuck!" I knew better than fold up a urine-stained bottom sheet and place it in the closet with the other bedding. I folded up all the dry bedding and put it away. Then I stealthily took the soiled sheet concealed in the bib of my overalls and headed for the stock tank in the feedlot where I rinsed it out. Trying to act normal, I took the wet sheet and hung it over the garden fence to dry - that site was out of Mom's general view from the house. After nervously checking to see if the sheet was dry several times during the morning. I finally decided it was safe to fold it up and secret it to its proper place in the house. Whew! That was a close call and if I'm not mistaken, it may have been the last time I wet the bed. However, I have learned from those terrible bed-wetting days that I am never "out of the woods." Because just when I thought everything was OK, then I wet the bed again. I am finally becoming a "big boy" and I am so proud! -Chuck Hinman This story was posted on 2010-10-10 11:33:55
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