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Chuck Hinman, IJMA No. 022: Teenagers: Where Do They Fit? It's Just Me Again 022 Teenagers: Where Do They Fit?. The next earlier Chuck Hinman story My Running Days Is Chuck Hinman your favorite Sunday with CM columnist, as many tell us? If so, we hope you'll drop him a line by email. Reader comments to CM are appreciated, as are emails directly to Mr. Hinman at: charles.hinman@sbcglobal.net By Chuck Hinman Most of us have or will have the experience of sharing our home with a rebellious kid. Fortunately most families live through these experiences -- later wondering how they did it. The following is the experience of my good friend Karen (a single mother) and her "brat" -- Tonya. Names have been changed for privacy reasons. About three years ago, my friend Karen departed on a long-awaited trip to visit friends in France. Left behind was the day to day parenting of her rebellious teenage daughter, Tonya. Relationships between them were strained to the breaking point. Karen had even asked they be on our rural church's prayer chain even though they lived thousands of miles away. So what's new in your life? Been there - done that?Karen was not aware that during the time she was in Paris, a classmate of her daughter had committed suicide. In the days following the suicide, Tonya recognized that another classmate named Christie was exhibiting signs Tonya sensed needed the urgent attention of the school counselor. As it turned out, Tonya, that "rebellious teenager" was solely responsible for putting together the expert help that followed, and perhaps kept Christie from committing suicide. Pretty remarkable credentials for a rebellious teenager, wouldn't you agree? The first thing that caught Karen's eye the day she arrived home and before she had talked with her daughter was that she (Tonya) had gotten a B, two C-s, and a D on her latest report card, far below her ability according to her teachers. Karen heaved a deep sigh knowing nothing had changed during her trip! Before she had an opportunity to "yak" at her daughter for her mediocre report card, she ran on to the following letter, opened and laying on one of the stacks of dirty clothes strewn around Tonya's always unkempt room. Karen was not prepared for what she was about to read, a personal letter of thanks and commendation from the parents of Christie, the girl Tonya had befriended when she recognized suicidal tendencies and blew the whistle to the school counselor. Following is the letter by Wendell Lyons, father of Christie, written on behalf of him and his wife Ada, thanking and commending Tonya for her wisdom in urging Christie to see the school counselor. Did I say "wisdom" . . . from a rebellious teenager? Surely not! Karen, the mother is rethinking her parental role. How important are her daughter's mediocre school grades? What if she does continuously trash her room and the house? Is Karen as a parent making too big a deal out of that? What should Karen say when she sees her daughter for the first time since she got home from her trip? Should she yak at her the minute she walks in the door? She can't tell her she read her personal letter! What do you think? What would you do if you were in Karen's position? Nov 9thEditorial Note: I first received this from Chuck Hinman in January 2007 with the actual names which are not used here. His first version was titled: "Teenagers -- Are they a mess or what?" - Robert Stone This story was posted on 2010-06-06 10:12:06
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Have comments or corrections for this story? Use our contact form and let us know. More articles from topic Chuck Hinman - Reminiscences:
Chuck Hinman, IJMA No. 014: My Running Days Chuck Hinman, IJMA No. 013: Funniest Weddings Chuck Hinman, IJMA No. 015: Small Town Cemeteries Chuck Hinman, IJMA No. 066: A forgotten gesture? Chuck Hinman, IJMA No. 196: Changing Oil Chuck Hinman, IJMA 330: Cow tales Chuck Hinman, IJMA No. 190 Spring Again Chuck Hinman, IJMA No. 340: Me and My Hair Chuck Hinman, IJMA No. 192: What's that smell? Chuck Hinman, IJMA No. 052: Reading Obituaries View even more articles in topic Chuck Hinman - Reminiscences |
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