Carol Perkins: All Gave Some, and Some Gave All

This most moving essay by Carol Perkins is posted just slightly later than we intended; it was received Sunday morning, May 24, 2009. It is posted now, on Memorial Day, as it should be. It is a timeless article, one, we'll make every effort to bring back annually on this day.-EW

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To read her next previous story click on Waspers, Punkins, and Tators

By Carol Perkins

When I heard Billy Ray Cyrus sing this song at a concert last summer, I don't think I had ever fully listened nor totally comprehended the scope of the lyrics. What better son to commemorate Memorial Day.

"Love your country and live with pride,"

Memorial Day was originally a day for honoring fallen heroes. It began when women of the South placed flowers (usually poppies) on the graves of their husbands and fathers who died in the Civil War.


This tradition later spread across the nation and included all casualties, not just those of the Civil War. Never was it intended to honor all the dead; just those who died serving their country.

"And don't forget those who died,"

Visiting Arlington National Cemetery near Memorial Day was a special time in my life. No visitor can leave untouched by the magnitude of the row after row of white tombstones perfectly aligned, like soldiers standing at attention. The changing of the guard at The Tomb of the Unknown Soldier is the most solemn ritual known to man.

Not a sound; not a breath could be heard. Then the playing of "Taps" flowed across the hillside. I had not known the full history of the tomb and how an unidentified soldier from each war was interred there. "There are really remains in those tombs?" I asked Guy naively as we walked away. I thought the tomb was symbolic.

Since the late 50's on the Thursday before Memorial Day, the 1,200 soldiers of the 3rd U.S. Infantry place small American flags at each of the more than 260,000 gravestones at Arlington National Cemetery. They then patrol around the clock during the weekend to ensure that each flag remains standing.

(About.com) In Metcalfe County, members of the local VFW position flags on the graves of those who served their country. In almost every cemetery from one end of the county to another, at least one flag is likely waving in the shade of a veteran's tombstone. It is impossible not to stand reverently and read the information on the graves of soldiers.

Some were killed in battle; some served but came home. Each honored with a flag. It is impossible not to feel patriotic and thankful to these veterans.

"America, can't you see all gave some and some gave all."
My father's grave is always flanked with a flag, just as the graves are of his brothers lying so near in Memorial Gardens. My Grandmother Sullivan sent five off during World War II: Johnny, Walter, Henry, Ernest, and Phillip. My Grandmother Reece sent three off to World War II and one to Korea: Russell, Robert, Ralph, and J.W. How did these women cope with their sons on the other side of the world without hearing a word from them for weeks and weeks?

"And some stood through for the red, white and blue, and some had to fall"

I have also touched The Wall. I etched the names of our Metcalfe boys, Billy Smith and Larry Rutherford, on a piece of paper to bring back to show my students and my family.

Both boys were near my age; I went to school with them. Name after name after name listed on that wall struck me speechless. What was there to say? Lost lives; lost fathers and lost sons.

Over 58,000 Americans killed or missing in action were inscribed on The Wall. This memorial is visited more than almost any other. My brother served in Vietnam. When he was ready to be deployed, he asked me to be the one to tell our parents.

How could I tell them he was headed to a jungle? Those months were grueling, but he came home. They all came home in my family, but left a part of themselves on battlefields in foreign lands, like all veterans of wars did. We must not forget them.

"And if you ever think of me; think of all your liberties and recall...."

Although I have not been to the World War II Memorial that was opened in 2004, Russell Reece, my uncle, made the trip. His daughter Annette took him so he could join his comrades who were so long overdue this honor (Most are in their 80's or older now).

One of the highlights of the memorial is what is called the Field of Stars. Each gold star honors more than 400,000 lives lost during this war. Several names from Metcalfe County are there. As you visit the graves of your loved ones this year, seek out each displaying a flag.

Could we stand for a moment at each and thank the soldier? Are we in such a hurry to stick flowers on graves and move on to something else? We need to reflect on the original purpose of Memorial Day. It's the least we can do because....

This story was posted on 2009-05-25 12:35:17