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All in a Dream By Phillip Coffey All is not well on Valley Drive and Woodson Street, Greensburg, KY. "Doofus" has now entered the psyche and the subconscious of my neighbors. I deputized "Doofus" months ago to monitor social distances of everyone within hollering distance of me, which is a 'fer' piece. He has exceeded his scope of sworn duty. Doofus has become the 'Freddie Kruger' of the neighborhood. Sadly he has entered a neighbors dream, thrashing him without impunity. My neighbor and lifelong friend Gary Bagby shared his 'Doofus nightmare' with me. It seems that Gary left a package of uneaten hamburger on his patio. He went outside to retrieve the package. Doofus had gotten possession of the package. A battle ensued over the contents of the package. Doofus' instincts of a Carnivore kicked in high gear. Gary was defeated and suffered mightily from the battle. He walked to our screened-in porch exclaiming to us what Doofus had done to him and showed us his battle scars. I had no response from what I observed. Gary is a kind and forgiving man. He also is a cat lover apparently. He told me to check and see if 'Doofus' has rabies'. He added that he would 'heal over' himself. All in a dream. This story was posted on 2020-06-22 06:45:05
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