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Carol Perkins: Them Bones

Previous Column: Is That You?

By Carol Perkins

"You have to be kidding," I said to my knee doctor.

"I don't think so!"

During my three-month follow-up appointment, I inquired about the difference in the length of one leg compared to the other, so he ordered a couple of scans. Sure enough, there is an inch difference.

"Look at the x-ray and you can see the difference," he said. "It has nothing to do with your surgery, but all to do with the hip." The hip on the good side was hiked up as if I had been posing on a red carpet with my hand on my hip. "See all the arthritis?"

He pointed to the fuzzy-looking matter surrounding the hip. "That's part of the problem, too."

I looked closely, having never seen arthritis in action.

"You need a hip replacement and that will solve the problem."

I gave him the bug-eyed look. "You've got to be kidding?" I replied. "I can barely get around now!" He assured me that in three months I will be much better with my knee and will, hopefully, want to go ahead and have this done so I can walk without a limp.

"The limp is coming from the bad hip," he said.

He wrote a prescription for a one-inch lift. Instead of investing in a lift from a professional, I ordered a few, but they were either too thick or not thick enough. I will now go for a fitting.

When I left, he told me he would see me in a year if not before and held up three fingers. It took me a minute to realize he meant three months. "You'll be ready by then." What he doesn't know is that my body isn't ready for another round!

In the meantime, I'll hop around like Chester on Gunsmoke and wait another five years to address the second issue. I thought of the "Them Bones" song:
"The foot bones connected to the shin bones; The shin bones connected to the thigh bones; The thigh bones connected to the hip bones; These bones gonna walk around..."
If one goes bad, you've had it!

You can contact Carol at

This story was posted on 2021-11-05 11:59:19
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