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A life lost to drugs, a mother shares in hopes of helping others By Linda Waggener, columbiamagazine.com It's coming up on a year since Seth died at the age of 24 years, one month and twenty-five days from an overdose. His mother has walked every parent's worst nightmare, struggling to help in the decade of her child's addiction, finding hope in the possibility of complete recovery, then his relapse and sudden death. The whole family is affected, but she, most of all, tried to work through addiction with him and is devastated that she couldn't save him. What keeps her hanging on now is knowing that he made it to rehab, he gained insights that could have given him long life had he stayed in it, and while there, he rededicated his life to God. She clings to the comfort of knowing he is serving God and and that someday she will be reunited with him. She had high hopes for Seth. This time, he had told her he was in rehab for himself because he wanted to conquer addiction and "get his life on track." In his too-short life, Seth Aaron Eaton lived to the fullest, always cracking a joke or making someone laugh. He enjoyed playing music, singing, fishing, operating heavy equipment in his work and hanging out. He loved picking on his little sister and spending time with his large family of many relatives in Adair, Barren, Taylor, and in Wayne Counties in Kentucky, in addition to his West Virginia kin. Seth was making every effort to get his life in order, he and his fiance couldn't wait to hold their baby who was to arrive in about four weeks. Two months before his last day Seth knew things were out of control. He was reaching out for help when he made contact with a rehab agency in Georgia. July 2015: His mother says Seth had been trying for two weeks to detox himself. She inquired about a phone conversation she'd heard one side of. He told her, "mom, I have to get help. I have to get my life back on track." She said God had put him touch with a man who spoke with Seth for two hours and then talked to her. She said that Seth was really anxious, but chose to fly out the next day, July 26, to Georgia. Then the three of them, Seth, his therapist and his mother, began bi-weekly phone therapy, conversations which she said were full of tears and with much accomplishment. August 2015: He talked to his mother on August 18 about staying in Georgia for what they called "sober living" but he was very reluctant to stay and miss his daughter's birth -- and his fiance wanted him home with her. His mother says she told him, "I would much rather you miss her being born and be here for the rest of her life." Wednesday, August 26: As his 30-day program was fully completed, he came home. His mother writes now, remembering thinking, "I should have called the therapist to discuss sober living but didn't. He asked if we could go to church Sunday. I said of course we can. Each day he went to a NA meeting, each day he asked are we still going to church Sunday." Friday, August 28, he was twisting a black bracelet and I asked him what it said, he grinned really big, held up his arm and said, " 'PRAY FIRST', I've been going to church while I was in rehab mom, are we still going Sunday? I said yes." Saturday, August 29: he and his fiance went to get cigarettes and he appeared to be under the influence when they returned. I immediately started questioning, all day I asked him and her, both denying it. His sister even asked her what was wrong with her brother, but she got no response. They went later that night to get pizza, I kept asking. I gave him his meds from rehab around 9:30 and he said, "this one makes me sleepy, are we still going to church in the morning?" I said, "yes" and he responded, "be sure and get us up if we aren't up." I sent a text to his fiance from the living room begging her to tell me what he had done, even told her he could die, I needed to know. She kept denying he had done anything. Sunday, August 30: In the early hours of Sunday morning around 1:20am, Seth was discovered "gurgling" and unable to respond. The rest is a blur of getting him onto the floor, having 911 on the phone, starting CPR, getting a pulse, his starting to vomit, turning him over, doing everything possible while waiting the endless time for the ambulance to arrive. I knew when we left home it wasn't good." He died that morning at Logan Regional Medical Center. Then his family's life spun into more of a blur as they began in the process of giving in to the horrific loss of their Seth, getting through his funeral services and burial. Seth's daughter Dallas Paige Eaton was born on September 15, 2015 never to know her father nor be held by him. As of this writing she has a new step-father. Seth's mother recalls that his journey to an early death begin with smoking marijuana around age 13, followed by going along with the crowd when it was "in" to drink cough syrup in high school, then moving to harder drugs, pills in 2014. Then in 2015, while he was laid off from work, he ran into an old school acquaintance that drew him into the money-making side of a drug that was developed for cancer patients -- synthetic heroin. She continues to live with the enormous grief of not having been able to save his life. She said, "I did drug test after drug test, searched Seth's room, at one point we took the door off his bedroom entrance. I was always aware of who he was with and who his friends were, the one thing I had going for me was that Seth talked to me and told me things that I would think, 'I don't want to know this'. I tried the tough love and I finally went to where he was staying and told him he was coming home and not living like that -- which is what led to his trying to detox then his choice for rehab." His mother, Paula Ball, wants families to understand they have to be aware of what is going on with their children and if what she has been through can help one person, she is open to contact, to listen, to share experiences of what worked along the way and what she'd change. She said, "Although, I was always aware, searching his room etc., the one day I didn't follow my instincts because one of our discussion with the therapist who'd said I had to try to trust Seth, I feel I failed him -- even being a trained Registered Nurse and knowing life saving skills didn't protect him. Even though she did every possible thing she knew to do each step of the way, she carries the enormous guilt with her grief in her broken heart. She says there's no blame, however, responsibility charges still may result from an investigation progressing into where Seth got the final drug. Few of us are without an addiction to something: drugs legal/illegal, alcohol legal/illegal, coffee, nicotine, colas, sugar, starch, fried foods, etc., etc. For Seth it was illegal drugs sold underground, the kind with contents that don't have to pass FDA regulations, the kind that can kill. He'd sent these words to his Mom in his last few days, "Don't hate the addict, hate the disease. Don't hate the person, hate the behavior. If it's hard to watch it, imagine how hard it must be to live it." "I miss him and his talks with me so much!" she said. "Seth never went a day even when he wasn't here at the house, without talking to me and he never hung up the phone or left the house without saying, 'I love you!' He was such a loving, caring person!" She appeals to all who read this for prayers for her family, and she is open to any messages or notes if she can be of help to anyone at any time who may also be going through this. Find Paula Ball in West Virginia on Facebook or contact her by email:paulaball@outlook.com. Click here to read A father's story on addiction to Black Tar Heroin. Writer Linda Waggener joins families helping to share their stories about battles with illegal drugs in hopes their words might help others. Click 'Comments' or 'Contact' below this article, then select 'Linda' to reply. This story was posted on 2016-06-23 10:27:42
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