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Helping our Youth and Community deal with tragic events Personal Commentary on the Sandy Hook Tragedy: A parent and youth development professional - he's the Adair Extension Agent for 4-H and Youth Activities - gives his take on the situation, and offers suggestions for coping. He encourages parents to be involved, be truthful, listen, and be there for the children when needed By Tony Rose Events of the past week are driving my news article this week. Why? This is the question that keeps coming up in my mind. After watching coverage of the school shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School on TV, internet, and social media, I still have no answer to the question, Why? As a parent and youth development professional I keep asking what went wrong and how could this have been prevented. I will leave those questions to more qualified people than me. How do we help our youth deal with this tragedy? Even though the tragedy did not happen in our community it still affects our community and especially the youth of our community. As a parent I would love to tell my children Don't worry this can never happen here but I know that is not true. Something like this can happen anywhere and the best we can do is try to prepare for the worst and work for the best. There are a lot of young people in our community that are asking the same question that we adults are asking. We cannot ignore their questions so how do we as parents and a community deal with their questions and concerns. There are a lot of resources that have advice on how to deal with youth and tragic events such as happened this past week. Here is a summary of some of what I have learned from looking over these resources. First, don't assume that the kids don't know about it. Be available and talk with your kids, share your feelings, reassure them and help them feel safe, support their concerns for people they don't know, help them find a course of action, and take action and be involved with your children. One of the most important things you can do with your youth is to be truthful. Don't pretend it did not happen. Don't say it can never happen here. Reassure them about everything that is being done to try and make sure such a tragic event never happens here. Talk with them about events and be honest that sometimes things happen that we just cannot explain or answer the question Why. One of the best things we can do for our youth is be a good listener. Let your children tell you what they are feeling and what questions they have. As you try to explain events use only facts that you know. If you don't know the answer just say I don't know. Spend time together. Do something as simple as taking a walk, eating together, and just making a craft project. Especially young children just need to know you are around and will be there for them. Limit your child's television viewing of these events. If they must watch, watch with them for a brief time; then turn the set off. Overall the best things we adults can do for our young person is just be there for them. Spend time with them, talk with them and be truthful. As a parent all I want to do is make sure nothing bad will ever happen to my children but I know that much of that is beyond my control. The only thing we can do is try to raise them to grow up and be the best person they can be. Please keep everyone that was involved with the tragic events of this past week in your thoughts and prayers. Always remember we cannot control how much time we have but we can control how much we spend with the ones we love. Make the most of that time. - Tony Rose This story was posted on 2012-12-17 08:04:46
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