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The Are You Unlucky Test

This article first appeared in issue 12, and was written by Billy Joe Fudge.

1. When you open a box of cereal does it always say open other end?

2. When you think you have a flat tire and pull over to check: are you always right?

3. When you turn on the Tv do you always have to change the channel to your favorite program?

4. When fall (out of a tree, off a ladder, etc.) do you always land on body parts other than your feet?

5. Do you always hang, rip, tear or sever something when climbing over a fence?

6. Are thistles, crab grass and poison ivy the only plants you can grow?

7. Has the phrase "third times a charm" replaced the phrase "I knew you could do it in your vocabulary?

8. Do you have to shop at more than three stores just to buy underwear?

9. Does breakfast in bed for you consist of Alka Seltzer and Tylenol?

10. Do the old clothes you put in the yard sale or give to the Salvation Army come back in style in less than 6 weeks?

5 or 6 yes answers indicate "be careful" should be your motto.

7 or 8 yes answers indicate you should only go out of the house on a "have to" basis.

9 or 10 yes answers indicate you should seek counseling and ask your Supreme Diety for protection.

This story was posted on 1997-03-01 12:01:01
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